Because our youngest was having a tough morning, and I can't carry him for now, my husband and him were back in the cry room for a large portion from the start. Eventually the little one fell asleep and they rejoined my three year old and I in the pews. During all that time that my oldest and I were in the pews, I have to say he did wonderfully. He was excited to be back at Mass, to see Fr. Tony from afar, snuggled up to me, read his church books, and listened. It was beautiful.
This Mass was beautiful for so many reasons. For starters, listening to the Gospel and seeing all the parts of Mass through the eyes of my little one were breathtaking. I saw how he saw the exchanges of gifts with the priest. I saw them bowing in reverence during the offering of gifts. I saw how in that gesture towards each other, they were recognizing the dignity and goodness that lives within each one of us, and thought: How beautiful.
I listened to the choir and my eyes filled again and again: How beautiful.
During the consecration, kneeling to pray, seeing the beautiful community I was nestled in during a prayer that is so much bigger than me: How beautiful.
The vestments, the people, the souls, the prayers, the words, the scripture, the history, our faith: How beautiful.
All I kept doing was seeing everything with glimpses of wonder and awe. Wonder and awe of the beauty, the goodness, the servitude, the thanksgiving, the offerings, the processions, the Body of Christ, and more. Everything was overwhelmingly beautiful.
Since love grows within you, so beauty grows. For love is the beauty of the soul.
-Saint Augustine
What made it more beautiful was the little set of eyes next to me. Seeing him soak it all up. Knowing that he gets to soak it up every time we attend. That filled my heart and soul in a way that could only be communicated with my mama-tears, again (Promise these aren't pregnancy hormones! You have to be preggo for that. I'll chalk it up to that amazing grace we often sing about.).
Suffering is a great grace; through suffering the soul becomes like the Savior; in suffering love becomes crystallized; the greater the suffering, the purer the love.
-St. Faustina
And then, what tied everything in together for me in a way that had me praying the simple words of Thank you, Jesus. over and over again was when the choir sang the song How Beautiful. This song is one that brings me to tears every. single. time. Never have I not cried with this song. The truth of beauty, service, love, and suffering strike a chord in me every time. Reminding me that there is no beauty without suffering. No suffering lacking beauty. Because there is no suffering that is done without love. And love. Love is always beautiful.
If you really want to love Jesus, first learn to suffer, because suffering teaches you to love.
-St. Gemma GalganiWe have such a gift, not only in the Mass, but as mothers and women. Christ even tell us so when he encountered the Samaritan woman. He began by telling her, "If you knew the gift of God..." Gosh, do we have such a gift! He spoke this to her, a woman. A Samaritan woman he met, and in so doing, he demonstrated a beautiful exchange that calls us all to the living water. Not water that runs dry. This truth encourages me to not only more fully embrace the gift of Mass (And to be thankful for the graces that were shared to be more fully present this past weekend.) but also to be thankful for my vocation that calls me to suffering and to love. To service and beauty. My feminine and beautiful vocation of womanhood.
When we have been to Holy Communion, the balm of love envelops the soul as the flower envelops the bee.
-Saint Jean Vianney
I had a beautiful time at Mass this past weekend. I'm thankful for this song that tied His Love and Suffering and the beautiful Sacrifice of the Mass together for my little heart. Now, with all the talk of the song, I feel it only right to leave you with a version I found on YouTube. I'll also write out the lyrics if you don't have time nor are in a place where you can play/listen to a song/video.
Prayers for all of us women and mothers! I know Mass this past weekend was beautiful for many. The scriptures were so rich and profound. What were your takeaways?
How Beautiful By Twila Paris
How beautiful the hands that served
The wine and the bread and the sons of the earth
How beautiful the feet that walked
The long dusty roads and the hill to the cross
How beautiful, how beautiful
How beautiful is the body of Christ
How beautiful the heart that bled
That took all my sin and bore it instead
How beautiful the tender eyes
That chose to forgive and never despise
How beautiful, how beautiful
How beautiful is the body of Christ
And as He laid down His life
We offer this sacrifice
That we will live just as he died
Willing to pay the price
Willing to pay the price
How beautiful the radiant bride
Who waits for her groom with His light in her eyes
How beautiful when humble hearts give
The fruit of pure lives so that others may live
How beautiful, how beautiful
How beautiful is the body of Christ
How beautiful the feet that bring
The sound of good news and the love of the King
How beautiful the hands that serve
The wine and the bread and the sons of the earth
How beautiful, how beautiful
How beautiful is the body of Christ
